Closely followed by sleepless nights and that smell of poopy diapers that never really seems to go away.
After my oldest was born, I was shocked by the state of my body. Sure people had warned me it would never be the same again. But whoa.
My hips were about ten feet wide, my belly looked like a deflated balloon, my entire body it seemed was painted with purple and pink zebra stripes, and my boobs that had once been an A cup were now easily double D's.
(For all the men reading, sorry about that last part.)
I wanted to show my baby off to the world, but how could I when I wanted to hide my body?
I was so ashamed. I felt very awkward, gross and unsexy.
When my baby was eight months old, I married her father and my (now) husband.
I know, scandal. But more on that another time.
So here I was, fitting my flabby, discoloured body into my wedding dress on what was supposed to be the day I felt most beautiful. But that is so far from how I felt.
After a morning of getting my hair, nails and makeup done, I looked in the mirror and at best felt that I was alright looking.
Now, I'm not going to say I was justified in feeling this way. I was emotional and probably hormonal. But I also can add that to my list of reasons you shouldn't have kids until after you're married.
So here I am, a year and one baby later. And what's changed?
Well, first, my attitude. Instead of throwing a pity party over the loss of my "good looks", I accept that my body has changed.
Second, how I define the word beautiful. While my stretch marks used to make my cringe, I now wear them proud. I think the saying is, "I'm a tiger who has earned her stripes."
Third, I started taking a proactive approach to my body. This means eating better, drinking more water, walking more and my daily workout… okay, every other day. But I'm usually lucky if I can drag my tired butt into bed at night.
I still struggle with body image issues. It's not as though all of sudden I was all "I'm beautiful blah blah blah". Everyday I have to get myself in the right mindset. And if I don't, then I usually end up in tears on the phone with my hubby (poor guy).
But then there's the other side of things: Once a woman starts to think her body is nice-looking, or even worse that she is beautiful, people judge her and call her "vain".
Umm… what? Didn't you just have an issue with me thinking I'm ugly?
Yes. But that's how people are I suppose.
And you know what? Maybe I am happy with my body. Maybe I do think I am beautiful. If that makes me vain, then so be it! I'll take vain over self-conscious any day.
I think we need to stop worrying so much about other people's bodies and worry more about how we treat our own.
Because in the end, who cares if Sally is two dress sizes smaller than you? Or if Leah has bigger boobs (again, sorry guys)? Or if Katie lost her baby weight faster than you?
Seriously. Who cares?
All you need to worry about is:
1) you are happy with your own body. If not, change it. It's as simple as that. You are in control of your body.
2) your husband is happy with your body. (If you aren't married, please move along.) 1 Corinthians 7:4 says, "The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband." Now you are allowed to disagree with me on this point, but I believe it means we should try to please our husbands by taking care of our bodies and dressing nicely for them (among other things, obviously!).
3) you are honouring God with how you take care of your body. Don't eat junk and laze around, but also don't hurt your body by pushing it too far in exercise or other matters. For it says in 1 Corinthians 6:20 (second half of the verse), "Therefore honour God with your body."
So basically, be healthy and you will be taking care of all these things!
Now this is just a physical look at things. I am not saying we should all ignore our "inner beauty" and focus only on our outward looks. This is just speaking specifically about our physical bodies.
Sorry about being preachy today. Just had to share what was on my heart.
God bless!
xo
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